Posted : Friday 05
July, 2002 |
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| Snow White and the 6 symptoms of cocaine usage. | | |
It took me awhile to actually think about this, and make sure it made sense. After much thought, it does make sense. Snow White is a movie that indiscretely makes reference to the white gold. For one her name is Snow White, the color of cocaine. That right there is a dead giveaway, but wait there's more. The names of the dwarves are named after, what i think, the symptoms of cocaine usage. Their beards were also white, it seems they would be that way because they are old, but it's only that way to the untrained eye, but to someone like me, who wastes their time on stupid things and points out the flaws of things, i take this into consideration when wondering if Snow White has anything to do with cocaine. It also looks like they work in a diamond mine, but those are no ordinary diamonds, they are crack diamonds, which they process into their sweet drug of cocaine.
All of them but Doc are guilty of the crime of being a drug reference. Lousy german midgets. Always with the drugs, well at least they will stay away from my family.
1. Dopey - When you hear Snow White, you either think of her or this dwarf. He may be the goofiest of the dwarves, but wouldn't you be if you were a cocaine symptom, he always run around with the oversized tunic and ears looking ridiculous and also crazy. He's pretty much level-headed when he doesn't take his cocaine, which i think he should stop doing.
2. Grumpy - After a while in the cocaine high, you get angry, or at least seem that way, but this curmudgeonly old bastard doesn't need cocaine to be angry, he just has a mental imbalance. Without his cocaine he's a rambling psychotic, dangerous to talk to and more dangerous to interact with.
3. Sneezy - Now this is a sad case, to most people when he has his finger up to his nose it may seem he is stiffling a sneeze, but in reality, this poor midget is getting his fix of coke by putting it on his finger. The other dwarves think he has a sneezing problem, but he is much smarter than them. Hiding your habit by putting it on your nose, you card.
4. Happy - Cocaine puts you in a euphoric state of mind, and this guy is the perfect example. So much cocaine usage has left him in a blissful state. It's tragic.
5. Bashful - When you do cocaine you sort of go into withdrawal, but most of the time you are hyperactive and full of energy. This guy is a case of the former choice.
6. Sleepy - I'm not sure if you become sleepy from doing cocaine, seeing as how i haven't tried it yet. But i am pretty sure doing cocaine takes it out of you. Too much cocaine makes this guy seem like a sufferer of narcolepsy.
Now i am not sure if all of this information is justifiable and substantiated, or if i am just rambling on about how i think Walt Disney is keeping secrets from us. Either way im done with this article, so until next time, bleh.
-James "petersonhank" Rivera petersonhank
AIM:hankahpeterson
Special Thanks to Matt from X-E, and also to
fouff from Big Meats
for inspiring me and for me borrowing pics from their sites.
And also for thieving fouff's layout. Stupid unoriginal me.
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